Christmas came early for me. Yesterday I got home from clinic to find this fabulous book on the bed. My man knows me so well, he couldn’t wait for Christmas either.
This time of year is traditionally filled with doing, doing and more doing reducing the ability to check in and hear what the body is truly saying. With everyone now out of lockdown and life returning to whatever normal is these days, I hear many women say; they aren’t ready to be around lots of people or they need a bigger space around them, or they’ll be in hiding until 2022.
So why, as a Somatic Sexologist, am I always banging on about consent when I’m here to share about all the juicy, sexy delicious pleasure our body's can experience?
It’s because we live in a world where women’s bodies and sexuality have been exploited so much and for so long, we women at times, don’t know what we truly want or don’t want and how to say no when needed. I’m talking about the times you’ve let someone to touch (or more) you when your body just wasn’t into it.
You get what I’m saying here, I know you do because we have all done it and possibly still do.
Learning the art of consent helps us feel safe and have agency over what is done to or with our body. Here’s the sexy part, when we truly feel safe, we can surrender into exploring all the erotic realms of delicious, sensual pleasure and orgasmicity.
So, here’s 3 simple ways to hear your body’s truth through the festive season (and beyond):
Pause before you allow someone to touch you. What is the response your body is giving? If there’s tension, take that as a clear no.
Play with saying yes and no on your own out loud and feel what happens in your body so it becomes familiar, and you can hear it more easily when with another.
Be patient, there is a lot, and I mean A LOT, of conditioning and overriding of our body that has occurred since you were born.
Enjoy finding your consensual full body YES, the journey itself can be pleasurable!